A lighter moment

I have a definite mommy brag moment. Potty training my little girl has been an uphill battle with me be the losing opponent. I finally took a leap of faith or pure insanity and put her in panties last week. Well, I then decided to name her puddle duck because of all the puddles that kept appearing all over my house. One puddle was even in her bus she likes to ride all over the house. (right after I mopped my floors I might add). I nice little trickling creek made its way from the living room into the kitchen. Oh well, can't cry over spilt milk, so to speak.

I was starting to give up this week, and decide my daughter was going to be in diapers for the rest of her life! When all of the sudden she tells me, "Mommy its time for the tee tees to come out." We even made it to the potty without a puddle in sight! Hallelujah I think we are getting somewhere. I never imagined in my wildest dreams that I would be this proud over a trip to the potty but hey I guess that is what makes you a mom.

Saturdays

I think that Saturdays are now the hardest day of the week for me. It use to be the day I looked forward to with eager anticipation. I knew that was the day that all three of us would get to relax together as a family. Play, eat, sleep, work, whatever came to mind or needed to be done it was always done together. Now have dread Saturdays. It is when Satan attacks my weak faith. I see other families busy just living and laughing together. It is hard to continue on and laugh and play when a member so dear is missing. His presence so needed.

Today was a little better than last Saturday. Em and I were able to laugh and play together. No we didn't get out but we did watch movies and play games. I have to admit I didn't do a good job at leaning on the Lord when I felt down. All I could think is I want to lean on Lyle, if not him, at least another human being. Growing....it's painful.

The Lord did take pity on me and carry me through and help me make it to hopefully a much better day and a happier post.

There was one bright note. I managed to have enough will power not to eat my way through being down in the dumps. I stuck to my points. I think that is a first for me. A praise that I didn't give up and give in. Now just onward to happier days......

In the beginning....

What do I mean by growing in faith? Well, that is what you will get to watch this next year if you view my blog. I am learning to have the faith of a child and trust in the Lord while my husband deploys.

It occurred to me other day that the Lord wishes to be a heavenly soul mate. The one we go to with our joys and fears. I think I have been relying on my earthly soul mate (my sweet husband) for so long that I have forgotten to lean on the Lord. I am learning to let go and give my earthly soul mate over to the Lord. I know within my heart that I have to let Him provide protection and care to Lyle. I have to also learn to accept comfort from my heavenly soul mate who is hear for me everyday and every minute.

So this year is going to be about me learning to trust in the Lord to be my best friend while my earthy best friend is away. It is going to be about trusting the Lord to help the year fly by so we can be reunited. Most of all it is going to have faith that the Lord will bring my love home.

I will never forget being at the airport and seeing a service member greet a fellow soldier's wife. He was the soldier's buddy who was in charge of bringing him home. As I watched this new widow sob into the arms of her husband's buddy I thought of how easily that could be me. She had a small child. I still have terrible fears of that being me one day. And I have to trust that it will never be me. That God will blanket Lyle is protection and one day soon I will have my soul mate back home. It is going to be a daily growing in faith....

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